documents and programs gone
mercies in the wreckage
– images remain
One night last week the gremlins swallowed most of the data on my computer and dealt it a near fatal blow. All my documents disappeared. Word and Photoshop were gobbled up. The document I was making to use for the e-book of haibun I had planned was lost as well as the draft manuscript for the sequel of my novel are gone. All that’s left are my image files and an old digital processing program I haven’t used in the years. Everything I’ve ever downloaded vanished and the USB stick I was using to get online failed.
The computer was so old and overburdened it was barely coping with the tasks I was asking it to perform anyway so there is no point in getting it fixed. Rather than weeping and soaking my pillows with tears of anguish I’ve decided the only solution is to upgrade my technology and start again. Sorting out and transferring the image files will take quite a while. As for the book on haibun – I’m ambivalent. I will slowly gather the haibun I’ve written and will write some new material but I’ve decided to take my time with this project. Ditto the novel sequel.
I’ve written this post on a public computer so I can’t include haiga images. Now it’s time to take a blogging break for a while and get the new technologies up and running. I’ll visit your blogs from time to time in the meantime.
linked to – https://haikuhorizons.wordpress.com/ – prompt: weep
http://chevrefeuillescarpediem.blogspot.com.au/ – soaking wet
I wish I’d had more time to respond to the prompts for The Month of Haiku on http://chevrefeuillescarpediem.blogspot.com.au/ during March. Seems the whole month is slipping by with me creating only a few haiga. To try and catch up I am responding to several prompts within one post.
Across Australia the only trees that change colour during autumn are those from the northern hemisphere that have been planted in ornamental gardens. Down where I live this time of the year i the grasses have faded to dun and russet. Brown earth shows through in patches where livestock have over-grazed the paddocks.
Yesterday I saw my first autumn leaves so I adapted the Haiku Kai prompt first flowers of spring to suit the southern hemisphere.
In a prompt relating to the work of the haiku poet Santoka Tanedas Chevrefeuille writes that repetition is used to traditional haiku. He says – ‘Repetition in haiku means using the same words more than once to make the scene stronger and more intense.’ I have applied this idea in the haiku below to emphasise how coming across a garden when plants have clothed themselves in leaves of orange and gold is a sight for tired eyes.
Prompt: New moon sky
With the autumn winds comes the hint of winter –
Working my way through the Carpe Diem prompts I see the last one concerns windmills. A hunt through my photo archives reveals an astounding fact – I have no photos of the unique Aussie windmill. I see scores of them whenever I get out of town. Maybe its because they are so common I don’t think of them as photographic subjects. I’m tempted to jump in my car right now and go windmill seeking but I have hurt my left hand and there’s no way I can drive today. A haiga about windmills will have to wait. I”d be better off spending some time in silent healing. Prompt: deep silence
A blogging friend of mine left a comment on my post Peacock dreams saying we are all responsible for our own happiness. On the haiku challenge Responsibility the host, Chevrefeuille writes- ‘You are responsible for reaching the goal you have set for your self … No one can help you with that … it’s your goal, it’s your responsibility.’
I agree with both these ideas. Very much so. I also think we all have responsibilities towards other people. Part of life is working out how to balance our responsibilities to others with our responsibility to our self. Fulfilling our own potential and developing materially, intellectually and spirituality is a basic human motivation.
Beyond all that though, I think we collectively have a responsibility towards the planet.
Some people fantasize that once we’ve fully exploited this planet we can all jump into spaceships and go off and colonize Mars – presumably to exploit that planet in the same way.
I seriously wonder about the mindset that thinks this is a good idea. I guess it grows out of the collective fear that the planet is dying and we’re all doomed unless we can escape.
I’m currently writing a sequel to my novel Outsiders (available here). In writing these books I’ve asked myself -is any other future possible? Is there any room to hope that future of humanity might be vibrant, successful and creative? I’ve come to the conclusion there is but it involves a radical change in the way we think about responsibility. If we collectively take responsibility for finding ways to live together peacefully and sustainably we can change the future. It begins with opening a dialogue I think.
This week’s WordPress Photo Challenge fits well with the photo challenge ABSTRACTION that I am hosting this week on Lost in Translation Weekly Photo Challenge – Abstract
Walking through town just the other morning I found a peacock feather lying on the path. It was outside a second hand stop so I guess someone had just purchased a peacock fan or something similar. Perhaps it was that as they left the shop a feather came adrift and wafted in lazy circles to the ground. Yes, I reasoned, that had to have been the case. Impossible to imagine a peacock wandering down city streets during the night to shed a single feather for me to find.
Regardless of how it came to be there I considered the find to be gift. I picked it up and bought it home. Animal symbolism fascinates me so I was curious to look up the totemic meanings people have attributed to the peacock. On the internet the first site I found was called Shamanic Journey. There I read -
‘peacocks feathers have an association with resurrection, rising out of the ashes. They can help us shed the old feathers of the past and to take back the true beauty of our individuality. This increases self-respect and confidence.’
There are other meanings attached to peacock feathers on other sites – some consider them lucky, others see them as unlucky. I decided to go with the first meaning I found for it has a particular resonance to where I am right now. Some reading this will know I have been providing a home for my daughter and her 3 children (including her autistic son) for the past 6 months. This has been an exacting and demanding time for all of us for the house where I currently live is too small to comfortably house so many people. There has been a lot of pressure on everyone. Things have been getting slowly better as my daughter’s financial situation has improved. She now has her own car and just today she found a house for her and the children. They will be moving in a month.
A weight begins to lift. I will be moving in a couple of months myself when the lease on this place finishes. What to do, what to do? Of course I should do the sensible thing and find another property to rent in the area asap – a place where I can write and paint – a place close to my daughter so I can help with my autistic grandson when necessary. Of course, of course, blah, blah – that old tiresome voice of reason will no doubt win out. All the same, for a wild and glorious moment I fantasize about driving off into the sunset taking nought but a few clothes, a tent and sleeping gear, my paints, my journals, cameras and laptop. I’m not working right now and could get away for a bit… I have a hankering to go to the desert…
maybe, just maybe I’ll do it …
Prompt: Carpe diem – bird feathers